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During a Crisis
Encourage them to use crisis skills,see my Crisis Skills Post
Things I will be discussing today are:(compulsive)self-harm,things to do/say,things to avoid and tips for friends/family of a borderline.
Things I will be discussing today are:(compulsive)self-harm,things to do/say,things to avoid and tips for friends/family of a borderline.
By Lisa Dietz from dbtselfhelp.com
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Tips for Friends and Family of Someone with Borderline Personality Disorder
It can be difficult to deal with a friend or loved one who has borderline personality disorder (BDP). Use these tips to handle tough times and help maintain a safe environment:
- Read as much as you can about BPD — knowing about the disorder helps you deal with it,join a support group or seek help from a therapist for yourself.Look after your mental & physical health,try not to isolate yourself.
- Encourage your loved one to seek treatment.Attend therapy sessions you are invited to,learn about the BPD's therapy plan and how you are involved in it.
- Understand that BPD behaviors aren't about you.
- Try to remember your loved one's triggers & avoid them,don't expect it to work completely.
- Don't allow yourself to be abused.
- Exiting the room during an argument excusing yourself politely to continue the conversation when emotions have gone down is a helpful approach.
- Don't expect medications to fix the problem 100%.
- Learn how to cope during a crisis and how to regulate your own emotions.
- Try to be consistent in your behaviour.(don't give in and allow something today and forbid it tomorrow)
Self Harm
Self harm can be a confusing idea to grasp for people who have never experienced these urges.It can appear in many different forms (see Crisis Skills, Bad Coping Skills and Self Harm for more info)
A very good explanations is found here : http://www.dbtselfhelp.com/html/managing_deliberate_self_harm.html
Below is an extract.
Contrary to popular belief, deliberate self-harm is not usually an attempt to manipulate others. Nor is it usually a ‘cry for help’. Most people are quite able to ask for help without self-harming and the secrecy that often accompanies self-harm demonstrates that something else is going on. That ‘something’ is known as ‘Dysthymia’.
Many people, particularly those diagnosed with Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder or Borderline Personality Disorder experience emotions in a particular way (Kroll J. 1988). When under pressure they may find it impossible to make sense of what they feel and become ‘Dysthymic’. This means that they experience all emotions at the same time but no single emotion in particular. This, understandably enough, is difficult to bear.
One way to ‘reset’ the emotional balance is through physical pain. Self-harm prompts the brain to produce endorphins, a kind of natural opiate, which overcomes Dysthymia and allows the person to feel better. So when a resident deliberately self-harms it’s likely that they’re feeling stressed and overwhelmed. It doesn’t matter how stressful others believe their situation to be. Different people have different coping abilities and what may be no problem at all for one person might well overwhelm another (Zubin & Spring 1977).
Self-harm can be done for many other reasons.Abandonment/fear of abandonment pain,suicidal urges,urge to do something drastic as emotions seem overwhelming,to give in to the urge so it will go away,as punishment,to deal with self-hate.It helps you calm down quite quickly from a crisis,to feel something during unpleasant dissociation & to break out of this dissociation,to reduce anxiety,obsession with blood,distract oneself,make bad memories fade.
Compulsive self Harm
Can include hair pulling/tweezing (trichotillomania),biting,skin picking and excoriation when done to remove perceived faults &/or blemishes on one's skin.They can occur as an OCD ritual,but not always.An OCD ritual obsessive consists of thoughts followed by the behavior as a way to relieve the tension & prevent something negative from happening by doing these self harm-behaviours.
Help can be found here:
Personally I have found inositol (consult your doctor due to possible medication interactions...) to be very helpful for reducing my urges to pick at my skin & pull out my hair.These behaviours may also be done when bored.Swansons have a nice 227g box which is cheaper than other powder boxes.True Hope also have a finer powder also 227(but will last longer than the Swansons box)
Sources :http://psychcentral.com/lib/2011/how-to-help-a-loved-one-with-borderline-personality-disorder-part-2/
http://www.dummies.com/how-to/content/borderline-personality-disorder-for-dummies-cheat-.html
my head &experience =P
Sources :http://psychcentral.com/lib/2011/how-to-help-a-loved-one-with-borderline-personality-disorder-part-2/
http://www.dummies.com/how-to/content/borderline-personality-disorder-for-dummies-cheat-.html
my head &experience =P
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